Results of the First Deliberate Practice

A while back I posted a deliberate practice concerning descriptive writing.  It was inspired by Shannon Hale's great gift.

I'm afraid my own attempts fall short of her mark.  My first attempt to infuse the piece with rich description resulted in overload and confusion.  Fortunately, my critique group caught me on it.  My second attempt was far more successful, for I focused not on changing my style, but on what sensory details to reveal.  I used less common senses of touch and smell in my story, and though I'm no Shannon Hale, I am proud of the result.

You can see the results, a free short story entitled "Lady of Deep Waters," here:

• Wattpad Early Draft of "Lady of Deep Waters" 
• Blog Version of "Lady of Deep Waters"
• Smashwords Version of "Lady of Deep Waters"  
• (More links pending)

Deliberate Practice: Description

Shannon Hale showed exemplar description in the sample of The Goose Girl.  Perhaps she worked hard at it; perhaps description is one of her favorite parts.  No matter what it was, we can use it to inspire our own deliberate practice.